nan | 楠木

    又到期末了。刚才整理了一下blog，把认为可以分类的文章设定了一下文章主题，突然发现，不知不觉自己也贴了那么几十篇文章了。粗粗一看，值得回味的东西太少了，大多是仓促而为的，也许只有那些老文字价值（于我）还大一些。而且访问量最多的文章，那篇《蝴蝶效应》，是我尤不能让自己满意的，多少觉得文字空泛，而没有说出完全的感受。

    最近忙。似乎总爱说这样的话，不过这次或许可以属实。周六上午先是去听世行行长的报告，中午又有幸能够与世行行长夫人一同进餐，餐中她和我们几位中国学生进行了广泛的交流，不过在场的男生少了点呵呵，以至话题集中在女性的奋斗上，男生的作用就是提供异性的立场。当然讨论学生的政治积极性时我们的话多了一些，嗯，男生就是男生，通常来讲政治我们还是更关心些。

    周六下午去看nokia校园3v3篮球赛。我们班的队实力有限，第二轮都败北了，系里的那支强队倒是踩着我们的尸首一路杀进了8强。计算机系有个黑人打的真好，可以轻松地双手反手灌篮。还有三个据说是首经贸的，身体素质也非常好，几个盖帽都非常地酷。

    晚上去对外经贸参加世行研究所(WBI)的演讲，与aiesec合作办的，我们asic也被列为了主办方之一。不喜欢女主持的风格，颇有些疯疯癫癫的，而且说句实话英语太烂。WBI的那个人倒是很朴素，而且年龄只比我们大一点吧，还是挺亲切的。美国大使馆的参赞当时也在，这个家伙中文非常地道（而且是京腔，感觉跟个老北京儿似的），末尾被个学生刁难了一下，那个男生要问台湾问题，老美断然否决了，那个男生又想给自己个台阶下想换个问题，不过无论英语还是中文都结结巴巴的说不清楚，搞的场面很难看。

    不知道是不是只有我有这种感觉，有时看到中国人热情地一嘴中文加英文地说话（就是中文句子里总爱带几个英文词）就感到难受。崇洋媚外？那倒不至于，只是觉得这种自以为的上档次很不入我的眼，颇觉得俗。呵呵又开始愤青了。

    周日早上要7点起来去参加协会的活动，结果睡到了7:20，很尴尬地赶到了会场，大家都如我般睡眼惺忪。8点的时候“校园文化寻旅”已经可以开始了，交换生、留学生也都到了，就是觉得人气小了点。我们组有个美国男孩，我上来自我介绍说"You can call me Nick"，结果他说他也叫Nick，于是我说你还是叫我“楠”好了。分特啊，每次用Nick这个名字都会有点差错。

    活动很顺利，一直到中午才结束，立即赶到南门和几个老同学见面。其中一个女生签证拿到了，所以来这边看看同学。在老北京面馆呆了一个中午，几个人闲着无聊，便都跟我又去看那个nokia 3v3了。我们系的队伍真不错，轻松打进了4强，半决赛被后来的冠军队干掉了但是场面打的非常好看，每个球都很精彩。另一场半决赛出了点问题，客观地说，那个首经贸的队被我们的裁判区别对待了，输的莫名其妙，队员也很不服气地离场了，连原定的3、4名也不屑打了。在场的观众（几乎全是清华学生）也有点哗然。我心里有点替他们不平，跟同学议论的时候恰巧那个队的一个队员走过，便对他说“哥们，你们今天打的不错！”，想给他打打气。不过其实我说什么大概都没有用，清华给他的印象肯定是好不了的。这事也不想多说了，篮球版上我已经说了不少了，作为一个不会打篮球的外行。

    至于这一周，就要有考试了，还有论文写，要忙了。

    其实用这样一个题目，多少有些不合适，因为这样等于为《生死场》强加了许多舞台之外的东西，而这或许并不是我的用意；不过既然的确是同一天之内发生的，内容上又有些许联系，所以请大家允许我懒散地在一篇文章里说了。

    我听说抵制日货的事情，已经是周五下午了，在水木上。特快再次人气高涨，起因便是，中午某日本公司在紫荆食堂进行饮品免费派送，而一些同学自发地打出了“抵制日货”的牌子，双方在那里形成了对峙。有一些同学在这种情况下依然领了水。网上展开了关于反日、抵制日货的大讨论。

    对于抵制日货，我可能一直持一种比较消极的态度。抵制的动机和诉求我理解，但我一直不认为这是解决问题的根本方法。解决什么问题？其实还是中日问题。中日问题是什么问题？就是民族关系问题。中日在历史上的纠葛太多了，而日本上个世纪对我们也确实犯下了滔天罪行。每当回顾历史，尤其我们民族那些惨烈的经历，我也会满腔怒气恨不得日本直接被灭绝。但是我觉得无论如何，冷静地想一想，这也是不可能的――日本会存在下去，中国也会存在下去，中日民族都会继续，而且继续做邻居。我们可以永远仇视日本，永远希望把他们彻底灭绝，但是恐怕这并不是一个现实的目标。

    日本的确对我们存在着仇视、野心等。日本也有些青年，还在做着大东亚公荣圈之类的白日梦，想着征服中国。无所谓。我们只要警惕就好了，没有必要同样抱着灭亡日本这样的不切实际的想法。我们最需要做的，就是让我们的国家强大起来，发展起来。从发展经济的角度来说，我们大还可以向日本学习。

    回到抵制日货。我前面说，我对于抵制日货是一种消极态度，因为我并不认为这是解决问题的根本方法――更本质的方法是发展本国经济。当然，抵制日货，可能可以和扶持民族产业等联系。不过，就像昨天的世界银行行长在清华所说的，全球化是必然的趋势，任何逆向的努力都是徒劳――既然全球化势不可挡，我们可能把中国市场的大门向日本关闭么？

    对于那天那些自发去举牌的同学，我真的很佩服你们，也理解你们，但是我确实不认同这整件事。另外我总觉得，中国的民族主义颇有些极端化的倾向，失控的话，损失的还是我们自己，因为国家的发展需要稳定。

    正好当天晚上去看了话剧队00级的毕业演出《生死场》，巧不巧，还就是抗日题材的。话剧我看的不多，也就去人艺小剧场看过两次实验话剧什么的，所以不敢乱评论，不过感觉这个故事还是太大了，不好把握，而且叙事手法相当繁琐，在大礼堂音响设备及演员发音水准的情况下对白的确不太好听清楚，造成话剧晦涩难懂。又或者是我听力太差了。

    好在还是基本看明白了。演员的表演，气势还是有的，表情如何就无法评论了因为距离太远，不过感觉化妆做的挺好，学生演中年人等本来就有难度但是效果还不错。全剧的高潮也挺有气势，虽然略觉得形式了一些。

    呵，然后突然想到，我好久没有在大礼堂表演了哈。

    嗯，今天心情很好。下午和几个会员一起去做外事接待，九十多名韩国高中生来我校参观。我们分成了两组接待两辆车上的学生。我们三个人的那辆，正好全是女生，呵呵。

    这些高中生真的是很可爱。让我想起了高中时代的一些美好事物，似乎什么都是简单而纯洁的。她们会聚在身边，听我费力地讲出一点校史以及对学校早期建筑的风格评价，然后“哇”、“哦”地一片低声的回应，表示她们听懂了。

    不过她们最感兴趣的似乎还是照相。学堂前。日晷。水木。二校门。大凡可以算得校内一景的，她们必要用各式各样的相机，从简单的一次性相机，到高级的数码，快门繁忙着，记录下一个个精彩的笑容。后来我也被拉进了相框，旁边一个两个娇小的女孩子，偶尔会羞怯地（其实并不羞怯呵呵）搂着我的胳膊，纤细的身子贴着我的臂膀，不顾旁边女生的“惊”呼和笑而从容地面对镜头。或许我长的比较成熟？又或者我表情善良？她们应该是把我当作大哥哥吧。嗯，不过我的确是守之以礼的，丝毫不敢轻举妄动，实足一个照相的道具，但是脸上的微笑我发誓是真心的。

    时间有限，于是我在前面带路比较急，可是另外那组慢，我们便不好发车。mm们围过来，要email，并唧唧喳喳地说个不停。有个小女孩真心细，连我残存的那点英国口音都听出来了，于是便问出了我幼年的海外生活。车开了，路线很好，从主楼前经过，绕到体育馆，往北过跳水馆而从紫荆公寓前路过。不得不说紫荆这片楼是很有气势的，当我们介绍说这是我们的宿舍时车里又是一片艳羡的“哇”，倒是给了我许多自豪之感。

    游览结束了。我们要下车，呵还真颇有些惜别的味道。一边挥手一边目送着车子开走，微笑着。还真是可爱的韩国mm啊。

    夜深了。坐在电脑前等待着一个漫长下载的完成。

    正好可以写些文字。

    最近好忙。或许忙是一种生活态度，然而于我总有些力不从心。当然我喜欢生活充实的感觉，亦于自己的懒惰深恶而痛绝，但是身体疲惫的时候，心多少也会有点冷。

    其实也不知道自己在忙什么。协会有不少事情要做，我不知道我是否态度热情饱满，因为有些事情我也是拖拖拉拉的，并没有尽自己的责任。学习当然少不了事情，但是我似乎除了写写作业也没有如何地努力，迎接我的成绩我几乎都可以看到了。

    最近开始跟着室友去跑步，他很能跑，最初带着我们一天15圈，现在已经加大到18圈了，我却还总是跑13、14圈。其实跑到十几圈的时候，再跑多少圈感觉都是一样的，只要腿不抽筋身体就可以坚持，但是总是觉得累了，累了，于是便要打退堂鼓，找各种借口停下来。猜想没有人跑步像我这样的，一边跑一边脑子里进行着剧烈的思想斗争。又或者跑圈实在是无趣，如果跑个什么路线可能我会积极许多。当然这也可能只是自己找的另一个托词。

    还要去驾校。其实师傅待我不错，然而总是觉得不自在，不喜欢他的说话。其实是很朴素的人，很难于他强求多少文化素养之类的东西，又其实我素质未必比他高，但是他的谈吐自己的确是难以欣赏。或许这便是阶级差异？又或许这便是知识分子的臭德行，总看不起最朴素的劳动者，然而有个问题，我却还远不能自称知识分子，连书生都尚且算不得，一介无名无能的大学生耳。又开始说不清楚话了。

    眼睛有点累了。打个哈欠，还没有下载完。嗯，我有个坏习惯实在是不好，那便是如今越来越喜欢把事情拖到最后，继而大抱佛脚。实在是没来由地把自己搞得很累。应该要做个有心人。对了，也实在不能再邋遢下去了，桌子从来都没有干净过。就连这个blog，感觉文章分类也都做的乱七八糟的，唉……

    或许真的是夜深人静的关系，自言自语了这许多……

    I never really enjoy satires. Maybe it has something to do with my sense of humour, but while I find Dr Strangelove amusing, I really don’t find it funny, in the sense that it is listed in the comedy genre. Wag the Dog is another political satire/comedy that I appreciate, but didn’t really laugh during the viewing process. Maybe it’s just me.

    Okay. Talk about a full hollywood cast. Robert De Niro. Dustin Hoffman. Any one of these two guys is enough to carry a film, and they’ve also got Woody Harrelson, William H. Macy? Yeah I know a lot of these renowned actors only have a minor role (cameo really for some, especially James Belushi as himself, hoho), but still a more than impressive cast to start with.

    And the ladies. Anne Heche does a brilliant job in the lead female role, though it’s only a supporting role for the main show, which is De Niro and Hoffman of course. I’m sorry, but I really can’t think of anyone, male or female, who can even try to steal the show from these two leads, so ladies please don’t complain if you feel that this is a male-dominant film and that the actresses play too small a part.

    The plot. Very mocking. It’s time for the election, yet the president is in serious trouble because of a sex scandal on the rise (sound familiar?). De Niro’s character, a Dr. Fix-it, is called to the scene to rescue the president from losing the election. What does he do? "Change the story, change the lead." He decides that the public’s attention must be diverted, and what better way to do that than to launch a war on another unknown country to the general US public?

    So he picks Albania. But please don’t worry because there is no war. It’s just propaganda! So he gets a big shot Hollywood producer (Hoffman) to help him feed the media with tv reels and rigged speeches. The opposing presidential candidate of course does not give up without a fight, but Hoffman and De Niro just keeps the punches coming―― they start a war; the war ends; a soldier is left behind enemy lines; the soldier is rescued…

    Sure all kinds of things go wrong in the process. The soldier(Woody Harrelson) they picked is actually a convicted rapist, and while they are transporting him for the big "welcome home" celebration he manages to get himself killed. Perfect. Now they can arrange a big emotional funeral for the hero who died for his country―― except he died not in Albania, but in a farm, shot by not the enemy but an angry father coming to his daughter’s rescue. But that doesn’t matter, how could the public ever know?

    Sometimes during the viewing of this film I felt the general public’s intelligence was being insulted. I mean, come on, are we that dumb? We can’t even see that there’s no war? But then again there’s one good question we really should ask ourselves―― what do we know, really? What really goes on behind closed doors in the high realms of the government?

    The film may be over exaggerating, but a lot of things it shows could be very true, and that’s what really make you frown and shudder.

    Identity, starring John Cusack and Ray Liotta, is a smart thriller/horror/mystery film that boosts more twists than the number of genres listed above.

    First off I am no John Cusack fan. No big deal, I just don’t have a liking for him, and I have not seen a lot of his features. Con Air was good, but it couldn’t help falling into the category of the run-of-the-mill action thriller in the end.

    But he gives a decent performance in this dark film. I say dark, because most of the story happens in a dark and stormy night, with eleven people trapped in a motel in the middle of nowhere because of flooded roads. What’s worse, they begin to get hacked, one by one. Familiar concept? No bet, but wait and see.

    There’s a another line parallel to the motel. A special law session is arranged in the middle of the night, because a convicted murderer is about to be executed in 24 hours, and his defense has come up with one last attempt at trying to prove him insane and thus escaping the lethal ejection.

    We know these two stories are connected―― how and when they join together is part of the mystery. Meanwhile the focus is on the motel. People die. The rest panic and try all sorts of things to save themselves. There are bits and pieces that the audience needs to put together, but it seems that we’re always receiving the wrong hints…

    Anyhow I’m not going to spoil the ending, like I’ve done already for some other films in my blog. See for yourself. All I can say that the plot is more than satisfactory, and though I came into the film with some hints of what it’s all about I still couldn’t help falling for it. The very last ending, though, is a bit over stereotyped but that really couldn’t be helped, I don’t see any other way round it.

    Now back to the cast. Not really a star ensemble, but John Cusack should offer some appeal. Ray Liotta is good in his role as a tense cop (or so it seems…), but don’t expect any great stuff from him. I still think Goodfellas is his signature film. (Though I have not seen a lot of his stuff really.) As to the others in the cast, not really names that rung bells (at least with me, anyway), but they are very convincing and a few of them steals the show sometimes.

    Good film all in all. Jumped out of its set of genres and really rocked. Just watch it.

    今天发生了一件比较ft的事。

    上午有nba季后赛，而我中午要去驾校，比较赶时间。比赛还剩5.3秒，spurs落后Lakers一分，Duncan在上线接到球后，无法把球传出，于是非常勉强地出手，球居然空刷入篮。Spurs反超一分，比赛还剩0.4秒。连我那个铁杆的湖人迷都一边大骂一边说，这场spurs就该赢，老天帮忙没办法。

    于是我便出门。刚把自行车推出宿舍，便听见整个1#楼炸了锅，一片惊呼、狂叫等诸多声音，我猜想一定是湖人翻盘了，可是怎么可能？只有0.4s了啊！这时候哥们短信便来了，我一问，居然还不是科比投的，这可更ft了。要说kobe 0.4s绝对什么都干的出来，可一个“小鱼儿” D. Fisher居然都能进，这可夸张了。

    于是感叹，自己错过了一个经典时刻。其实本不会的，就是一念之差的事情。可是又有多少事不是这样，大脑电光石火的瞬间的一个想法，给了你一个完全不同的路，一个完全不同的下场、结局。事后或许只有唏嘘哀叹的份，也有可能是狂喜庆幸，总之是难以预料了。

    或许这是件好事。至少说明，任何事在其未尘埃落定之前，都有可为，都尚可改变。就好像用笔写字，最后那一画没有提笔之前，其实我们永远都不知道到底写的是什么。

    呵呵，认识我的不要激动。我不抽烟。是我的室友。

    其实他大一进来的时候就抽，不过在北京没买烟，带来的抽完了也就完了，故而戒了。不过这次寒假回去跟老同学聚在一起，受同学影响又开始抽了。这次他准备比较充分，带了不少烟，又买了一些（他嫌这边的贵），所以一直都有的抽。

    大约知道影响不好，所以他在我们屋抽的还少，经常是跑到隔壁去吞云吐雾去（-_-）。其实大家并没怎么被他的烟呛着，不过二手烟的危害人人还是都晓得的，所以也便时常开他的玩笑，让他给我们买保险云云。他总是一笑了之，不过心里肯定还是有些想法的，终于在酝酿了不少次的“戒烟”行动后今天抽完了最后一根烟。

    这当然并不意味着戒烟成功，故而我的标题有点自欺欺人。不过我对该君有信心，毕竟是一起混了两年的哥们了，这小子什么品格我自认为还是很了解的。

    顺带发挥一下。其实我们每个人又何尝没有些自己不大在意别人却很介意的习惯。这时候应该多为身边的人想想。

    嗯，有则改之……

    听说有个同学，5.1提前一周就回家了，还要晚一周才回来，即羡慕又忍不住想发笑。

    显然因为家很近的缘故，我没有了那种急切的回家的心情，又因为各种原因，没有出去游玩的计划，所以这个假期过得颇为自闭。其实我一向如此，大抵从小就可以一个人呆很久也不会闷，总有事做，只是碰到久未谋面的友人而畅谈的时候才会开始留恋“社交生活”。原来跟人聊天都是那么快乐的事情。

    有件事挺高兴，就是终于下定决心要列个清单了，自己都看过什么电影。决心建立一个小档案，初步的内容有片名、年代、国别、主要导演/演员以及我的打分。其实还可以有很多内容，大如对影片的简要评论，但是虽然我承认自己没看过多少电影这项工程也太浩大了，所以也决心要简单些。现在刚有那么三四十部片子，要么是近期看的，要么是桌上落起来的别人还的而我一直懒得收起来的dvd。打分想随意一些，尽量反映自己对影片的看法，但是也有些畏手畏脚，因为一些公认的经典我还是很认同的，打分还是要拉开点档次。不过现在就已经有好几部满分电影了，呵看来我还真是只看精品啊～～～

    假期除了看了不少电影，去了两次驾校、去了一次天津，大概就没什么内容了。玩游戏不值一提，也的确没怎么玩，下定决心今后玩也只玩一个游戏，那就是counter-strike，否则实在是太花时间了。嗯不过这么竞技的游戏，总想玩好些，也够花时间的了。甩狙。

    还有很爽的就是下了不少nba playoffs的录像看，球好看还在其次，好久没有听到这么爽的英文解说啦！耳朵非常受用啊，顺带间歇还看了些广告，不错不错。

    本来预定了一个学习计划，基本上没有执行。作业倒是还算做了，没有把问题留给交作业的前一天晚上，还好了。

    ft，电视又在播《英雄本色》，那熟悉的配乐――

    假期结束！嗯，继续无聊……

    Every once in a while I get to see a film that’s unconventional by my standards―― conventional meaning that the story is straight forward, there are elements of common entertainment like action scenes or thrills ‘n’ chills, or it’s a typical stereotyped film that falls easily within a given genre. Not that conventional means cheesy or unoriginal―― not at all, since like I said all I do is probably watch conventional films.

    But there are films that do not fall in my definition of "conventional". Donnie Darko, starring Jake Gyllenhaal, is such a film.

    This is another film that deals with the time travelling theme often portrayed in sci-fis before. Donnie is a high-school kid who has pyschological problems―― he has to see a pyshciatrist and also has to take medication, and every now and then he goes for a little sleep walking. Not a bad thing to walk in your sleep, we soon find out, since a jet engine crashes through his family’s house and right through his room at night, but Donnie escapes death since he was out on another sleep walk. The strange thing is they could never find the plane that the engine belonged to.

    Then Donnie starts experiencing hallucinations―― he has an imaginary friend called Frank dressed up in a giant bunny costume, who asks him to do acts of vandalism like flooding the school or burning down a guy’s (Patrick Swayze, of Dirty Dancing, in a interesting little role) house. Frank’s orders get increasingly violent, while Donnie receives a count down to the end of the world (morning after Halloween, in fact).

    Frank also teaches Donnie on time travelling. Actually Frank is no other than Donnie’s sister’s boyfriend, only he’s from the future and we see that he’s been shot in the eye. And with the help of a bizarre book written by Grandma Death, ―― a old lady of 101 who likes to walk back and forth from the middle of the road to the mail-box――, and the school physics teacher Donnie apparantly understands the basics of time travelling: all he needs, in theory, is a worm hole and a vessel…

    But anyway parallel to this development Donnie also befriends the new girl at school, Gretchen Ross (played by the charming charming Jena Malone, oh isn’t she nice?). They both have a liking for each other and falling in love was only a matter of time.

    Then Halloween comes. The parents are out, and Donnie and his sister holds a party. Donnie’s sister’s boyfriend Frank goes missing, while Donnie and Gretchen go visit Grandma Death. They get into trouble with two punks from there school, Gretchen fells down in the middle of the road, and Frank’s car which happens to drive by runs over her. Gretchen dies, and Donnie in a fit of anger shots Frank in the eye and kills him.

    The countdown to the end of the world is near. Donnie realizes what he must do, and he takes Gretchen’s body with him in his car. In the morning he sees a jet plane get sucked up in a worm hole, and a jet engine falls into the hole…

    The time goes back to 28 days before, the day when the engine fell in his house. Donnie is asleep in the bed, thus killed by the jet engine. The family grieves his death, and Gretchen who didn’t know him then, shows her compassion to the family…

    I wanted to write down the story, but I see I’ve done a really bad job. My narration gets nowhere close to the actual feeling the film gives me, you can say it tells just about the basics of the story, but it doesn’t touch you. Anyway what the film meant, I guess, was that Donnie’s not getting killed got things messed up, and he reaized that in order to make things all right he has to die, killed by the engine. He uses the engine as his vessel for the time travel through the worm hole, and everybody else is happy… Yet the audience can’t help feeling a bit down… Brave sacrifice.

    What really works for this film is Jake Gyllenhaal’s performance. He is Donnie. He can be a bright kid, but there are times when he does show a dark and somewhat twisted side, and I can’t help feeling sad for him. He’s just a troubled kid growing up, and there are some moments when you sincerly just hope everything works out for him.

    The cast boosts an interesting ensemble, with some of the bigger names in insignificant roles, such as the aforementioned Patrick Swayze, as well as Drew Barrymore who has a curious role as Donnie’s English teacher. The film has a very moody feel with the help from a nice 80s soundtrack (the film is set in 1988), and visually it’s also good to watch. All in all a good film that offers a lot of thinking room long after you finished watching.